Jeff Bezos said what? Insulting corporate rivals are all mad

There is nothing like a populist rip fight between two companies whose combined stock market totals of 125 other S & P 500 members put together. If you score at home, it is important that Walmart increased his minimum wage to $ 11[ads1] an hour last year, leading to competitive features of
Target

and others; that the average worker makes $ 17.55 per hour, including benefits; that Amazon and Walmart have different geographic tracks, where workers face different costs; that Amazon went to $ 15 an hour last year among a swirl of bad pressure claiming poor working conditions; and, on the other hand, it has a responsibility for shareholders to minimize taxes within the framework of the congress.

The letter from Bezos was a rare smack-down twofer, and also calls out
eBay
.
The quote Amazon's 52% increased annual growth in third-party sales since 1999, compared to 20% for eBay in the same period. EBay boss Devin Wenig took the highway straight to a low blow. "While I appreciate ink … I will dedicate the letter to the customers, purpose and strategy," he tweeted. Then, "We do not compete with our sellers. We do not bundle endless services to create barriers to competition."

Tough scoring on this. Amazon has obviously improved on eBay's growth, but Bezos has abandoned its arbitrary lilac exposure. The starting point for his math coincides with the launch of Amazon's third-party business, as sales were close to zero and as eBay's sales were already substantial. Seen differently, from shortly after birth, I have had 32% compound annual gains in cumulative hours lived. Hold the applause.

And no, Don Rickles didn't come back to life this week, sprout shoulder length hair, and take the top job at T-Mobile USA. It was John Legere, who has a rich history of tweeting nuance in other industries. On Wednesday, he posted the new black hole photo that has astronomers upset. "Not aware that they captured a picture of @ Comcast's customer service," he wrote. Then, he used dashes, slashes, and other keyboard characters to mock two sets of heart rate measurements, normally, and accelerated for "when opening the @ Verizon bill."

I'm not sure what this new trend means, though
Wells Fargo

beating earnings estimates on Friday, searching for a new CEO. Here's an out-of-the-box idea: Consider the Triumph the Insult Comic Dog, a cigar chomping hand puppet pronounced by Saturday Night Live alun Robert Smigel. I can't imagine Triumph being a standout to maximize lending spreads in a low-grade, Dodd-Frank world, but his fat jokes are out of the chain.

However, I will try my hand at the new firm -down game all the cool chiefs play. I am not an executive, but I do not believe in having a lack of experience stand in my way. For Christmas one year my brother got me a book called How to talk about books you haven't read . I agree with their broad strokes, although I never came around to read it.

So where do you start?
McDonalds

: I like your McDouble sandwich, with its two burger patties and a piece of cheese, and hold the whole thing to a respectable 390 calories. But you're not wondering about your Double Cheeseburger. There is only one McDouble with extra cheese.

Slam! It's going to leave a mark.

Verizon Communications: What happens to the dead spots on the Hudson River train line that goes from Manhattan's Grand Central Terminal north of Westchester County? It seems to stick with your low customer turnover and the latest win in a network rate and availability ranking at Wireless Signal Opener Signal.

Oh, yes, I went there! And I just get heated.

Delta Air Lines

: I have noticed that you are now able to lead people up separately for boarding flights: something called Diamond Medallion, then SkyPriority, then Comfort +, then one passes through anything. The way to capture marginal revenue opportunities along the shame curve. On a recent flight, when they called me and the rest of the zone one, I barely had enough confidence to look down on zone two. But the plane was clean, the crew was polite, and the arrival was on, as usual.

Too far? Better let it be there for now.

The most epic top brass story of this week was aimed at nobody in particular, and thus perhaps all.
Walt Disney
s
Bob Iger, you may have seen, revealed the company's new streaming service on an investor meeting on Thursday, and sent the shares 12% higher on Friday. But before that, while accepting a humanitarian award at the Simon Wiesenthal Center on Wednesday, Iger spoke scathingly about the state of public discourse. "Hitler would have loved social media," he said.
Facebook

Twitter, and Google was last seen and looked at their shoes.

I would end up telling you to follow me on Twitter for more evil takedowns, but Iger really killed the mood. Instead, I guess I'm trying to say some nice things to people in person this week. As a total square.

Write to Jack Hough at jack.hough@barrons.com