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I want my third wife to bash his $ 7,000 diamond engagement ring to my daughter

Dear Moneyist,

I am 62 and get married for the third time. I bought my next wife a beautiful $ 7,000 diamond engagement ring. Do you think it would be OK to ask her to pass it on to my daughter after she passed?

Engaged to get married

Dear engaged,

Nothing says I love you, "PS When you go, I want you to pass this on to my daughter." Or "I have already had two wives, and I have lost two rings for posterity. My daughter deserves this. "Or how," Since we get married and plan to spend the rest of our lives, let's talk about what's happening with this $ 7,000 lump of change on your finger after you die, it seems like a shame to take it with you, and if you were cremated, they would have to remove it anyway, so I have a plan to keep this diamond in the family. you open the ring box … "

Nothing says I love you," Let's talk about what happens to this $ 7,000 lump of change on your finger when you die. & # 39;

OK, I clearly take your request to the extreme, but it does mean to me that it is probably not a good idea to take up the subject of your fiancé's unique death when giving her an engagement ring. She should have at least 5 minutes to indulge in a dream time and imagine your life together and how romantic it will be before taking her back to earth with a request that essentially says you give her the right to wear this ring for her lifetime, but after that it goes to your daughter because you finally spend $ 7,000 on it.

Don't miss: Women do not want to marry men who boast about this regular status symbol

If you do not feel comfortable and give her this engagement ring completely, you should probably a) give her something else for your engagement (maybe a vacation in a wonderful place) or (b) remain single. Don't give her a call with the terms attached. It puts money effectively in front of romance. While it is always a good idea to chart your financial goals before you marry and discuss housing and even a forgiveness agreement if one of you brings more assets into the relationship, an engagement ring should be exempted from it.

Don't give your fiance a ring with the terms attached. It puts money effectively in front of romance.

However, there are some precedents for dealing with engagement rings like an ATM. Almost one in four millennia said they had no problem selling their engagement ring to pay for a house or college, according to a 201

6 survey published by WP Diamonds, a diamond recycling company. Less than a quarter of older generations feel the same. This figure, with a number of studies that conclude young Americans, appreciates experiences of things. They do not feel bound by the same social conventions as their parents or even older siblings.

See also: Married Americans for love or money? Finally, an answer

Extravagant diamond rings is a relatively new phenomenon. On average, men spend $ 6,351 on an engagement ring, up 25% in six years, according to a 2017 survey of 14,000 American adults who are engaged or recently married, and use the wedding site The Knot. The social expectation of engagement rings was actually created by jewelry and diamond companies in the first half of the 20th century, and later became a tradition in films. Giving a diamond ring to mark an engagement goes back to the "A Diamond is Forever" campaign by DeBeer's diamond company, as the worthy feeling. It was written by copywriter Frances Gerety in 1947.

In some states, the gift of an engagement ring is only completed after you say "I do" at the wedding ceremony.

You are also not the only one who sees a diamond ring as a gift that comes with strings attached. Last year, a young lawyer in D.C sued his fiance for the $ 100,000 4.06-carat engagement ring he gave her. He called it a "conditional gift". (The family law varies from state, but in New York City and Washington, DC, the gift of an engagement ring is only completed at the wedding ceremony.) Buying a $ 7,000 ring is extremely generous, but only spending an amount that allows you to give an unconditional gift. That way, your third wife will never have to wonder if it will be pulled by your finger and quietly handed over to your daughter after she dies.

Do you have questions about heritage, betting, weddings, family fathers, friends or any difficult issues related to manners and money? Send them to MarketWatch's Moneyist and please include the state where you live (no full names will be used).

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